Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Terrible Twos??? Pishaw

Those who are ahead of us by just six months in the parenting space have been saying that a 3 year old is NOTHING like a 2 year old and a 3 1/2 year old is nothing like the kid you had at 3.  Man oh man were they not kidding.

Mostly, it's all good.  We make funny faces before bed and hers are the best.  She tells me secrets like when she's grown up she wants to take me to Disneyland, and Daddy can come too.  I can't be sure, but I think she thinks she'll be a grown up within the next two years.  She is helpful, she loves to have a job to do.  Thank you for jobs big enough for a wee one to help with.

Naps are a thing of the past.  She still rests at school, and I'm sure the AH-MAZING teachers run such a tight ship that she even sleeps on most days. Weekends...not so much.  If we've had a crazy busy day on Saturday I can somewhat get her to do a quiet activity on her own during the day on Sunday, but mostly not so much.

The real pain is the gap between her patience and ability to use words to make her point.  When she's tired, like after school or late on the weekends she can't hold it together when she doesn't get her way.  And by hold it together I mean, she's on the floor, there are tears, she can't seem to hear us, or calm down.   There are brief moments when my instinct is to talk to her louder than she's yelling and then I remember a few things:

1) I'm the mom.
2) I'm in CHARGE
3) I do not want to live in house where people yell.
4) Talking to her in a low, calm voice at her level helps her calm down.

There are times when her frustration boils over because she just wants to feel like we heard her.  This is super easy to manage.  We sit and I tell her I either heard her, or when she calms down she can tell me what she's trying to say.  She is an actual person.

damn it mom...
She has, on occasion given me stink eye or really scowled at me.  Those moments break my heart because I can see into the future and the terrible teenager that she could morph into.

I can predict two futures, one where she stops getting her way and the fact that we hold her back from watching hours and hours of Paw Patrol turn her against us and we have to sleep with our bedroom door locked so she doesn't knife us in our sleep.  The other where she's a semi-reasonable child who can roll with the everyday disappointments that life brings.  I'm hopeful we're doing everything we can to be the second family.

 She'll be 4 in about 6 weeks and that's a good thing.  I'm sure four will be a total breeze.