When you're measuring your life by how you stack up to others your success or failure is totally dependent on whom you choose as a yard stick.I find it so interesting and humbling that the people I measure against also look to others for validation. (This means that I’m not the only neurotic person in the world.)
My ex-friend Demonica (I swear, I will get into that later) made statements that made me realize she thought I had it all: good job, decent pay, my own home and money to travel once a year and once in a blue moon to places like Italy. I look at Juniper and see someone who runs a successful small business, has a beautiful daughter, a husband who is a total delight and the ability to grow a lush garden and I think "wow, my life is shit". Juni looks at Yazmine who just got married and moved into a behemoth house and can only compare her fabulous but 100 year old house and think something is lacking.I suppose it’s good that we aren't friends with anyone REALLY successful.
I was complaining at work about being one of the lowest paid on the team. (Note to managers PEOPLE TALK to each other!!!!). My wise mentor told me to take a chill pill because when compared to the average for the state I'm well above, and in comparison to the rest of the world I'm in the stratosphere. He wasn't being dismissive, but trying to give me some perspective.
One of the big regrets for me at the moment is the fact that I haven't found my Mr. Tpgal. I worry that I won't have a family and that I'll die alone. (Not soon mind you). But, when I look at the unhappily married I am filled with relief as it seems better to be alone than miserable. Not all married folks are miserable – but the ones that are scare the daylights out of me. How on earth do you get married to someone and then end up hating them? It just seems like an unbelievable leap even though it happens.
I guess the lesson is (and now, on a very special episode of Blossom…) be thankful for what you’ve got. There’s always someone who has a hell of a lot less.
No comments:
Post a Comment