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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Tips & Tricks for Diabolical Deeds from the “It wasn’t me” Craigslist killer

       1)      Use the Internet from your own house to find victims.  Only the super duper smart police people can actually track you to your home. 

2)      Set up a fake email address and name.  Of course, to do this you'll probably have to provide your real email address in case you forget the password.  (Security is important!)

3)      Look directly at the security camera in the place you're meeting your victim.

4)      Don't bother with hats or glasses, so many people look like you, so why bother?

5)      Take a souvenir or two!  Come on, she's dead; no one will miss her stuff.  Heck, if you take jewelry you can have your sweet unsuspecting fiancé wear it and get an extra thrill.

6)      Act shocked and innocent when the FBI knocks on your door.  The more outraged you are at the mere suggestion that you did something wrong the better off you are.

7)      Go ahead with the planning of your wedding.  The urge to kill will surely fade once you've committed yourself to your college sweetheart. 

8)      Find your victims on Craigslist.  There's NO WAY they have logging of activities there… I mean the interface is terrible. 

9)      If you do happen to get nabbed by the coppers, claim insanity.  Don't let the fact that you're an above average student in medical school hold you back. 

Best of luck!

2 comments:

The Real, Unsuspected Craigslist Killer said...

Well, smarty, I did get away with it, didn't I?

PNB Dave said...

It was YOU, wasn't it, TP Gal?