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Thursday, April 01, 2010

...

Do you recall the friends that were involved with the failed camping trip that resulted in a sad severing of friendship? Well frick... none of that matters anymore.

I got a phone call this morning that Kristina, the wife of said couple had a heart attack and died yesterday. This news is incomprehensible and beyond shocking. Regardless of our state of friendship of late, I am heartbroken for my friend Bill, their daughter, and Kristina's boys who must be horrified.

I wasn't sure what to do with myself this morning. News like this requires action of some sort. I spoke with the Pastor from our church and with a few mutual friends and then decided that to say nothing to Bill was wrong. We haven't been close and I'm ok with that if that's what they needed, but silence at a time like this dishonors the friendship that we had.

I called and apologized for intruding but wanted to express my sorrow and let him know that if he needed anything he could call. He thanked me for my phone call in the most heartbreaking way that said to me that calling was the right thing to do.

Finding my person has been wonderful and whenever he's late or doesn't phone I worry that something horrible has happened. I'm sure it is the same feeling that parents get when their kids are out of sight for too long. I know these fears are irrational and that you can't live under that shadow or your whole life will be a macabre exercise in waiting to get your heartbroken. I also know that eventually, we all have to move on, but this timing sucks. Kristina was 46 and a fierce mom who adored her husband.

I wish our friendship had recovered before this terrible event, but I believe that if the roles were reversed they would be offering up all sorts of love and support - because that's what you do.

There will be a funeral next week and I imagine it will be brutal. I wish.... you know what I wish, and it isn't possible.

So, hold your people. Call that old friend. Hug your dog.

1 comment:

RisibleGirl said...

Terri, I'm so sorry. I'm also very proud of you for doing the right thing. When stuff like this happens, I wish everyone knew like you that everything is water under the bridge.

I hate to tell you this, but I still worry about my boys and the hubs and imagine all kinds of horrible things if they're late. Women are worriers. xoxoxoxo