1 year anniversary

I was reminded today by a friend that today marks the one year anniversary of my surgery.

ONE YEAR!!! WOW

I'd like to say that it feels like yesterday that I was checking myself into the hospital and waiting with my mom for the surgery team to come gather me, but it doesn't. So much has happened and that person who agreed to go on this nutty journey isn't really here anymore. She pops up every now and then in a fleeting moment of shopping insecurity like when I walk past the big lady section at the mall and I wonder if the sales people in the petite section will let me try on the clothes I've chosen.

I adore that big girl because she took a huge risk that allows me to be where I am today. I hope to always see her as brave.

It is a dangerous association for people who are considering weight loss surgery to equate the loss of weight with the finding of your life partner so I don't talk about love on the support sites. However, if you had said to me last November 19th that one year to the day that I would be going to an open house with my fiance to taste the menu for our wedding I would not have believed you. (Have the ravioli, ooh it is so good!)

This year has changed me in many ways. I'm a smaller person and yet my appreciation for little things is so much greater. I have more energy than ever before, I enjoy going to the gym, and my body temperature is LOW. I AM COLD ALL THE TIME. I have never been cold before - that is an oddity.

Do I recommend this surgery for all people battling obesity? NO!
You have to be willing to walk away from food choices that are not good.
You have to give up carbonated pop, you have to focus on nutrition.
You have to work out.
You HAVE to take your vitamins.
You have to be prepared for people to gush over you when you want to be invisible.
You have to be prepared to be a little irritated that people are nicer to you when you are smaller than when you were big, but you're still the same person.
You have to embrace the fact that sometimes you will throw up, sometimes you wont poop for a few days and then when you do it won't be very nice.
You have to be ready for your hair to fall out, and then grow back funky.
You have to be ready for it to be "all about you" even when you want to focus on your friends and family.
OH, and you have to be ok with food holidays (Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, Hanukkah or Thursdays) to be about something different, but that your people will still eat more food than you could eat in a week. You have to be ready to have the servers in restaurants to think there is something wrong with your meal when you eat 1/3rd and don't want a doggie bag. (It's better to split with someone....)

I am ok with all of these things. I even love some of them. I don't feel like I'm deprived, I enjoy good food and am having the time of my life!

Thank you Terri for today.

Waiting....

I'm not a patient person.  I am in limbo on a few things that are making me nutty right now.  Here's my list:

1) The actual news about my employment status.  (11 days until they HAVE to tell me; and a phone call about my status isn't the same thing as the real letter.)

2) Annual girl test results.  The test was Thursday, waiting waiting waiting
3) First mammogram results.  I'm 40 now so that's a fun new test
4) Waiting for some actual work to do at work

When I complained to J about this he replied back with this list. 

1) Waiting for the first snow
2) waiting for 9.19.09
3) waiting to go to Denver for the first time
4) waiting to meet the in laws
5) waiting to go on our honeymoon
6) waiting for the time to come home

Ok, his list is better than mine, a tad bit more sticky sweet than you may be able to stomach, but still…it's a better list.

The Fuzz!

A while back I blogged that my hair was finally coming back in.  I'm happy as all get out about this development as I am rather vain when it comes to my mane.

There is now a very even distribution of new hair growth long around my entire head.  This new growth is about 2 inches long and is mostly tucked under longer hair, but where it is visible where I part my hair.  I normally sport a sleek part but I now have a mess of curly fuzz.  No matter how much time I spend with the hair dryer in the morning, I have this halo of new hair around my head.  There is a fine line between not enough hair product and too much.  The amount of product it takes to make the fuzz lay down makes me look like I've been working in a potato chip factory over the industrial fryer.  (NOT PRETTY)

I am hopeful that it will continue to grow and within a few months I can get a haircut that will blend the new in with the old.  In the meantime, I am ignoring it as much as I can.  I guess a fuzzy do is better than a bald do (for a girl anyway.)

My doctor said that the Iron he prescribed will also help with the hair growth, so I will endure the unfortunate gastric effects (uge) of taking massive doses of Iron in order to have lovely hair.  If I would increase my fiber, the UGE would be lessened. 

Yes, indeed, this IS what I'm blogging about.  I know there are world events that require our attention, but you do not turn to me for my opinions on Iraq's desire to have our troops gone by 2011, or the guy who shot his 6 year old (who turned out to have been a little drunk at the time… grrrrrr), or the idea that Hillary could be Secretary of State (a VERY nice way to get her out of the Senate and since she's NOT an idiot, it might be a good move.)

I blog about my hair.  I’m not ashamed.

True, but funny?

I'm continuing to get mail from hospitals and companies who are eager to get paid by my deceased aunt.  I've called PharMerica (an online medical supply company) 4 times to provide Aunties physical and fiscal status and I still get mail.

I'm on the phone with an associate in their collections department and I said I wanted to let them know that she was "still dead"  and "still broke" - the dude didn't laugh, smirk or even acknowledge that what I said was mildly funny.

I think my humor is too dark for collection agents. 

That's just sad.

Be Careful What You Ask For...

J is a great sport, he's easy going and generally very open to new ideas and experiences. I'm not quite sure he was ready for the aftermath of the "Will you marry me?"

I have an acute awareness that the wedding is only a day, and that the important thing is the life we are building together. However...the wedding planning is an experience.

If you've been paying attention you've heard me say that I am a big fan of the Martha Stewart Wedding empire. I faithfully buy the quarterly offering of the latest dresses, cakes, and ideas. I knew J was a keeper when (before the actual engagement) I saw the newest issue and bought it with him and he didn't run for the door. Poor guy didn't know that at home I had about 20 additional issues. These are for reference...and damn it, it's girl porn! (I don't and won't complain about Maxim that arrives monthly. We each have our interests.)

The planning is going well. We're ahead of the game in a lot of areas and are currently mulling over the invitations and will start the photographer search in earnest after the holidays.

While I am "the bride" I am working on not being overly "it's my way or the highway" on things. I am presenting options and photos so he can see my vision. There's a new idea floating around for the bridesmaid dresses that is really exciting to me and at first discussion J wasn't all that warm. But with more information and a few visuals that may change.

There are certain things about a wedding that the groom just isn't equipped to deal with. It's not that they aren't smart enough, or strong enough...but really, what heterosexual man cares about chair covers? Shoot, what straight (never been married) guy even KNOWS about chair covers? It's a crazy expense and I think it will be worth it. The chairs at "the manor" are terrible and chair covers will neutralize them and be a dramatic decorative element that will make our floral investment pop. As committed as I am to this expense it was hard to bring it up. Even talking about it was a little embarrassing. The look of confusion on J's face was one I don't want to see again.

We've set a budget and little items like this will increase the spend. However, I'm happy to cover things like seat covers out of my monthly play money. Suzy Ormond probably would yell at me for that, but damn it...it's my day. (lol) It's our day. OUR DAY

I'm not complaining about the wedding planning. I've waited a while to put an event like this together and am enjoying the process. I love that I had a vision and that my gal pals are contributing -- fun fun fun!

J is enjoying it too... last weekend we sampled the first idea for wedding champagne. TERRIBLE. So, we'll keep looking. The search for the right wine and champagne offering will be fun.

There will be more wedding stuff here in the future, and when it is all said and done -- photos! Until then...have a great weekend.

A day off

Oh how I love a day off. I got up this morning at the same time I would if I were going to work and I got so much done.

I bought a dress for a dinner out later in the month. One dress, ah ah ah

I had a mammogram on two breasts, One, Two! ah ah ah, two breasts!

I loaded up three boxes of stuff for goodwill. One, two, three boxes, ah ah ah

I did four loads of laundry, One, two, three, four! Ah ah ah ah! Four loads of laundry

I purchased 5 pairs of black (sexy) panty-hose. One, two, three, four, FIVE pair of panty hose, ah ah ah ah

I purchased 6 items at Fred Meyer, one, two, three, four, five, six items. ah ah ah.

I also made dinner for my guy, picked up a ring that had been sized and made the bed. (making the bed isn't really a blogworthy item, but this is my list damn it!)

It's back to work tomorrow where my largest contribution to the world will be holding down a chair for the most of the day. ah ah...ick

Veteran's Day

Here's a TP Gal shout out to the veteran's I know:

To my dad who served in Korea - woo hoo!
To my brother who served in Iraq (twice) - woo hoo!
To my uncle who served in Vietnam - woo hoo!
To my future father in law who served in Germany - woo hoo!
To my friend Brett who served in the Gulf and Korea - woo hoo!
To my friend Craig who serves in the Gulf - woo hoo!
To Becky's dad who served in Korea - woo hoo!
To my cousin Vern who served in Germany - woo hoo!


To all veteran's, thank you for doing a job that I wouldn't want to do! Your service is appreciated!

Possible Honeymoon Location

We're talking about honeymooning in the Canadian Rockies... this little hotel seems mighty fabulous.

The Weekend Update

I love the go go go weekends because time flies, I get to see friends, it is fun and good.

This weekend my plans sort of fell apart and while I was sad to not be able to get together with a friend who I haven't seen in ages I'm basking in a glorious two days with no obligations.  Laundry is getting done, J is busy going through his pantry and ditching lots of stuff.  If you make waffles once every 8 years, do you need a waffle maker?  Personally, when I NEED a waffle, IHOP is happy to make me one.  

We bought a new coffee pot - the kind with the pods.  I'm torn about this little machine.  The first issue that was resolved prior to the acquisition, this little wonder has a filter so we can have coffee without having to buy the pods.  Thankfully the pods are recyclable but I'm still struggling with the plastic.  My second issue was the fact that it only makes one cup at a time. However,  I'm finding that I like a weaker blend of coffee than J, so I can have my "weak ass cup of coffee" and 2 minutes later he can have his "stomach lining killer blend" and we're both happy.  The other thing I like is that we make 2 cups, not 8 and the machine is off (rather than warming coffee we're not going to drink) thus it seems more energy efficient.

J's interpretation of this paragraph is that I was "kind of a bitch about the coffee pot, and now I've warmed up to it."  Then he added  "kidding!!!  (I mention this because it is actually true...he said it, and it was accurate.)

I just finished the 2008 holiday card.  I figured since I didn't send one out last year, and 2008 was such a huge evolution that it needed to happen.  It's a lot of "me" pictures, but I suppose it won't look too vain.  (hope)

I did get some indication of where I'll fall out in the work situation.  There's a job that the new overlords are looking at me as the possible candidate.  It's a great opportunity, not much of a stretch from my current responsibilities, but of course 100% different.  The challenge... LOCATION.  It's in Delaware or in New York.  Rather than force me to decide right this second the manager is putting me in a grouping that will give us time to work together to decide what is the best thing for everybody.  

Moving...well its a crazy idea, but there is some up side, especially if it was only for a few years.  Living on the east coast would be a new and different experience.  If we were in Delaware we could rent and then keep our home out here so we would be sure to come back.  Nothing is decided - I don't have ANY details on the offer or when I have make up my mind.  (Er... we have to decide, this is a group decision between J and me.)

Next on the agenda is errands, I bought a suit and it needs to be shortened (HOBBIT), I need a 3 hole punch to help keep my wedding binder in order (OCD?) and I may need to have my toes professionally painted.  I can get down there now and do it, but it's only $15 for a very professional job and...they massage my feet.  GOODNESS!

I should run and help J.  It is wrong to ask him to throw stuff away and then not help.  

Grammar Police

Ok people, there are many little rules and nuances in the English language that are confusing. I do not claim to be a professional writer and I am certainly not a qualified English teacher, however there is something that has been bugging me lately.

I was in a meeting with my esteemed colleague MJS listening to some very high mucky-muck talk about the future of the IT organization and the culture and blah blah blah. He had a casual, likable style about him and I thought to myself that he was rather smart. Smart, that is, until he dropped this bomb:

"Irregardless of the next few...."

WHAT THE HOLY HELL!?

Irregardless is NOT a word! If it were it would mean the exact opposite of how people use it. Regardless means "no matter what" and "ir" means "not" so "irregardless" actually means "not no matter what" or "not at all. " Do you follow me? No, try this:

You say: "I will love you irregardless of your weight!"
You mean: "I will love you fat, thin, chunky, tiny, huge, whatever!"
You're actually saying: "I will only love you at the right weight."

If you only learn one thing from the TP gal, it should be this. STOP using "irregardless!"

For the record, none of you whom I know in real life use this word. There was a frequent offender, but we don't run in the same circles anymore. (The cause of the separation is 100% unrelated to the offending word under discussion.)

Thank you for letting me get that off my chest. I feel a sense of relief.

What TP is talking about on this historic day

I'm thrilled about the election.  I was fearful that even though President Elect Obama had the lead in the polls and the majority of votes that the vast right wing conspiracy machine would kick into action (again) and further kill my trust in our system.  I'm excited about the change, but agree with some who believe that 4 years may not be enough to undo the steaming pile of pooh that we're in right now.

 

With that said, what's on my mind today?  Work.  Grumble.  I'm so very frustrated with the lack of information, the inability to see or understand the line of thinking around transition activities.  My (former) management made us go through and map out everything we thought we would have to do to transition the work we do to the new company.  This wasn't a fun activity, but I did it.

 

We met with our new management and they looked our plan and basically said "well, isn't that nice?"  A bit dismissive if I may say so.  I'm ok with them driving the transition (or rather non-transition) but I'm still being asked by my (former) management to provide dates and status on the list I made up.  They are aware that no one cares but them, and yet I'm still being pushed to march forward on this silly stuff.

 

I LOVE MAKE WORK!!!!!  It is totally super.

 

MOOD:  CLOUDY

 

Some days I am positive and feel like there is transition work that might keep me employed here until March or April (my dream would be June - that's a financial dream, not a "wouldn't it be fun" dream) but today, I'm in the "get me the f*ck out of here!" place.  I'm thinking that 12/1 - I will get a 60 day notice of termination.  Today, that plan doesn't seem terrible to me.

 

Financially, getting let go in June rocks; it would enable me to "retire" until 2010.  A January departure date would still enable me to pay off my tiny credit cards and take a little time to deal with the condo I'm about to sell, but the priority would be getting a job before the money runs out.   Either way... I'll be able to fund this wedding (which will be fun fun fun) and start my marriage with no debt - that's not a bad scenario.

New Fictionary Additions

Joggle = the unfortunate movement of my extra skin (after the weight loss) that occurs when I try to go for a run.  "I'd love to go for a jog, but the joggle messes with my rhythm. 

MapGuess = the MapQuest printout of areas that it isn't quite sure of (like the Redmond area.)  "I'm not sure if it's 23425th SE 345th Court West or SE 324th Avenue West or 324th North Court East South?

Hold on to your shorts....

I've been hinting at something for a few days now and it is time to share. J and I have been talking and we've decided that we're going to get married. You heard me... TP gal is getting hitched!

I've heard it said that when you know, you know, and believe me -- I know. Without getting overly mushy and sappy I would like to share that J not only feels like family to me, he is the partner for which I had been hoping. We have a lot of fun together, but I feel strongly that when the chips are down that he's the one I want by my side. He has been amazing regarding the work thing; he's supportive and listens when its needed and provides distraction and entertainment when the situation is required. His family is fantastic and he has been fully accepted by my parents and the Aunts & Uncle.

We've scheduled a September wedding (09.19.09) and have picked a location and a caterer! The ceremony itself will be simple and sweet and we're hoping the party will be fun! We'll be doing some dancing and I believe we will have at least one bottle of wine on hand!

Picking caterer was a huge decision that we wrapped up this week. We got a few quotes from caterers that are clearly proving a level of service that I frankly can't relate to. The one company 'cut down' the number of bartenders by three to bring the food cost down to only $1000 over my entire wedding budget. Conversely we were given the name of a caterer who offered us a screaming deal, but I couldn't get her on the phone and her staff couldn't answer basic questions. I would rather pay more for a partner than cheap out and have to stress that the food is even going to arrive. J has been amazing about the planning and a good sport about everything that has to happen now vs. later. He's interested and has an opinion, but so far not any violent opinions about things that are ... um... not to sound all "Bridezilla" but wrong.

J mentioned that his cousin Teresa would be making our cake and my first thought was 'uh oh, my first lesson in compromise.' But it turns out that she has been to culinary school and is a professional cake person. Fan-damn-tastic! How thrilling to have someone who likes us make our cake. J has some fun ideas about what he'd like to have and I just want it to be pretty so I'm happy.

I did accidentally try on a wedding dress - even though it is WAY to early to pick something out. I saw it in the window and popped in to see the price (to get over it if it was hella expensive) and it was quite reasonable. The shopkeeper asked me if I wanted to try it on? Oh my... the idea that I would be able to try on dresses that weren't in the big lady store floored me so I said yes. As I stepped out from behind the red velvet curtain in that white dress my body temperature rose about 10 degrees and my heart started to race. I looked like a bride!!!!! I do want to go dress shopping with my girls and I hope that in the spring we can coordinate a weekend to make it happen - in the mean time, I'm envisioning myself in that pretty dress saying sweet things to my wonderful guy.

On the 'attendant' front - I'll be having four ladies standing up with me, Yaz, June, Becky and Janie. They all have been supportive and important in their own ways that there is no way in HELL that I'm picking a "Matron of Honor" They all mean the world to me and I don't think there needs to be a hierarchy so I'm not going to do it!

Here's hoping TP gal doesn't turn into the wedding update site, but you may have to hear about it more than you want. What can I say? I'm a 40 year old woman who is about to marry a man who makes her heart flutter and makes her laugh until she can't breathe. I'm happy happy happy!

World Series

I'm not a sports blogger, but it is super exciting to see former Mariner Jamie Moyer be part of team that won the top prize in baseball.

He was a solid, stand-up guy in the Seattle organization and I was sad to see him released. This win makes the sadness of not seeing him in Mariner colors worth it.

Way to go Jamie!

Congrats

Tee Hee

Those of you without older brothers may not get this, but it made me laugh out loud:


more animals


And this one... we'll you know where I sit:

see famous look-a-like faces

The work update

Things are still status quo at MegaBank; still no definitive news on what's what. There's lots of misinformation rolling around. People share their opinion about what they think is going to happen as if they know what is going to happen. It is easy to get caught up in the hysteria. Honestly I'm trying not to get too worked up.

I'm resigned to the idea that I'm going to lose my job. I'm just hoping that the timing is good (as if there can be good timing to be unemployed.) My fingers are crossed (a perfectly acceptable strategy) that my release date will be in the summer. Let's put our collective heads together and pray for a June 30 date. June 30. June 30, June 30!

There's NOTHING magic about that date other than it is halfway through the year and the weather starts to get good in July. I could spend some time with Becky at Gambleside while my poor boyfriend slogs to work everyday. (He's sweet, but he won't quit his job to play with me even if I ask nicely.)

A March release date is a more realistic expectation, I can make that work too. It won't be the "retirement 2009" situation that a June date would be, but I'd still enjoy my summer.

The "Retirement 2009 Program" scares J a little bit. I wonder if he's worried that I'll NEVER go back to work and that he'll be stuck with a deadbeat girlfriend. tee hee. (It wasn't a planned thing to make him fall in love with me and then for me to suddenly have no income... honest. I'm totally trustworthy.)

ok -- enough. Get back to your life, but.... come back soon - there is gjavascript:void(0)oing to be exciting news here soon.

Movie Review: The Invasion

What the world needs is more remakes of decent quality scary movies from the 1950's.  In 1956, Invasion of the Body Snatchers was a scary concept.  The idea of space travel and aliens were high on the list of things that were frightening to folks.  These days, alien invaders in the form of microscopic organisms isn't as scary as say some guy becoming President, dying and then his pretty, but inexperienced VP runs our nation.  **Shiver**

 

(Get off your soap box tpgal...) 

 

In the 2007 version of Invasion Nicole Kidman has to fool the alien infected masses by looking stoic and unemotional, which is right up her Botox Alley.  She also has to beat the shit out of some kid and get spit on my Jeremy Northam (who was totally dreamy in Emma, and can't seem to play anything but creeps now.)

 

To be fair, Invastion wasn't terrible; it wasn't OH MY GOD awesome, but it kept my attention and at one point I did require the comfort of a big strong person to save me from the stupid thing that Nichole was doing.  Note to self, when you're locked in a pharmacy and waiting for help and you hear a room full of people banging on a blood soaked door - DO NOT OPEN IT.  The blood is a CLUE dumbass.

 

The pace of the movie was good, and while the dialog got a little 'fake medical' at times, I found myself caring for the characters.  So, as a mildly entertaining DVD during the halloween season, I give Invasion a thumbs up. 

I need a day off from my weekend

Oh my...my description of everything on the agenda for the weekend was pretty accurate. Here is is 7 p.m. Sunday and I'm pooped.

Our mashed potatoes for the cider pressing party turned out great. In typical TPgal fashion, we made too much. We were told that we were cooking for about 20 people, but it turns out the kids dined on pizza so our two huge crock pots of warm, creamy garlic mashed potatoes were too much. However, we did not come home with pounds and pounds of leftovers. I scored enough turkey, gravy and potatoes to make a yummy dinner tonight.

The cider pressing party was good fun. Becky's parents have this large wooden press that you feed the apples (and some pears) into to chop up and then once the barrel is full a wooden lid is screwed down onto the fruit and the excess juice is squeezed out. It was a true group effort in that all the chopping and pressing is done under manual effort.

In addition to pressing 15 cases of apples into the freshest and best tasting cider I've ever had, Becky also pulled of a perfectly wonderful turkey.

We've been enjoying stunning fall weather so we were outside the whole day under a tree that was shedding leaves. Fabulous!!!

A busy Saturday

I'm officially back from my non-vacation to Greece so I guess I should start acting like I'm in town.

Today there's a lot on the agenda. Breakfast with J's work buddy Bob (the anti-relationship guy.) I liked Bob the first time I met him. He told this "great" story about how when he moved his family back to the US from South Africa the funny folks on Air France thought it would be funny to tell him that both the family dog and the bird they were transporting had died in flight. I'm not really sure where someone begins to think that something like that might be funny - but it really wasn't. When they landed in Paris Bob made the folks show him the dog and the bird. For some odd reason every Air France manager was on the tarmac to apologize and make sure Bob was happy. (This happened years and years ago, I'm sure by now they know it isn't funny.)


After breakfast, we are running to my house to pick up some stuff (i.e. my desk and the crock-pot.) A trip to the grocery store is in order as we're bringing 20 pounds of mashed potatoes to a harvest party at Becky's. (20 pounds pre-cooked.) Later this afternoon, while Sleep Country replaces the torn box spring on the brand new bed that J purchased I'll be peeling and boiling potatoes.

Tonight we're going to dinner with our friends Doug & Chelsey. (Are they friends...are they family? They are both.) Anywho Chelsey's parents are coming into town and we're all gathering to celebrate some big news.

Last night, J and I went on a date. We went to SIP in Issaquah for wine, cheese and a yummy dinner and too much desert. He's great for me, as we split the appetizer and the entree. We couldn't decide on which desert to order so we got two, but didn't eat half of either. The leaded coffee was a bad idea, but it tasted GOOD.

So, this day is underway... Bob awaits at the Kirkland Pancake House, so off I go.

*blush*

A friend sent me a copy of a Facebook exchange between two friends that I'm sure was horrifying for the people involved.

The scenario is this, girl 1 posts a photo of herself with a famous person whom she knows through an artistic skill that they share. Girl 2 comments that the famous person has not aged well and refers to her by a common but incorrect nickname. (i.e. referring to Mother Teresa as "terri" -- NOT COOL)

So, the exchange is going back and forth and then BAM the famous person comments "what's up?" The girls try to cover with saying how she looks like some teacher of theirs from ages ago and the famous person says:

"so, I guess I have aged - well yes we all do! and I am not a Patty thank you."

OUCH!!!!

The lesson here...be careful what you say on the Internet about people, they likely are reading you. I've made that mistake about folks in my real life, but have thankfully edited myself after my senses took over. I am prepared to apologize for my comments no matter how true or justified I felt they were at the time.

It's one thing to talk smack about some famous person you don't know, but if you do know them, perhaps you should either remember to be kind or be prepared to say to their face, "hey you look old."

Voting

I'm so sick of all the political ads that are so negative and hateful. The governor race in Washington is awful, neither of the candidates has anything to offer in the way of hope for a renewed future. Instead of telling us what the candidate will do to improve the state, our economy or education for our kids they are posting ad after ad that vilifies each other.

The presidential election isn't much better, but I have a solution!

My absentee voter packet came in the mail, so I'm going to vote today and all these ads will go away.

You can thank me the next time you see me.

Maybe this will help

Without going into a lot of detail for those of you not subjected to my daily "I'm so in love" emails - it may need to be said that things with J are going extremely well.

We are however settling into a routine that allows for more independent time to pursue our own individual interests while still enjoying each others company. Right now, I'm blogging and he's vacuuming something. I feel no obligation to run into the other room to help.

He has not only met my parents but gone "home" with me for a visit. This was a big deal, most of my best friends have never gone home with me. J was able to spend time with the Aunts and with Uncle Ed. We did the standard TPgal family event where we helped someone around their house. (This time it was my parents.) J and I hit Costco and brought M&D much needed supplies and then puttered around their house. J is technical support for the family (his and now mine) and he installed the new big screen tv.

This weekend we bought a (gasp) new bed. J's set up was more than 10 years old and needed to be refreshed. You are now wondering... are these kids shacking up!? The official answer is "of course not." I have my home and he has his. My place will likely going on the market after the holidays, but for right now I have my own place.

So, we made it to church this morning and somehow I got volunteered (meaning I didn't say no) to teach 6 weeks of Sunday School and to give a 5-7 minute talk during Advent on the "Power of Waiting." Pastor Kirby thinks "my story" is inspirational. Um.. I was angry and sad and finally decided to take control over my life. I'm sure my "speech" will be more than that. I know that my pre-2008 life taught me a lot about how to be really appreciative of the joys of my world. It's not all about the new relationship either...it's about really loving things like being active, feeling attractive, having a sense of direction and ownership over my own destiny.

The Sunday School thing is just wrong. I'm a tad bit too evil to teach Sunday School, but maybe I'll learn something. Maybe there's a life lesson for me.

Work...well, it is pretty bleak. I'm balancing the desire to get laid off with the guilt over not coming anywhere close to my normal level of work ethic. I will be looking for new work, but am likely to hang out and collect a severance check. There's something in the hopper, but no details yet.

Have a great Monday (or Sunday if you're hanging out on line.)

OUCH!!!

I don't normally blog about sports but as an alumni of WSU (cougars) this headline caught my attention:

USC ends Cougars' scoring streak 69-0

I think the next time the Cougs call asking for money I'm just going to scream into the phone... "69 to Zero!?"

Americans...tisk tisk

I was standing in line at Dairy Queen and the guy in front of me was marveling at the display of candles for sale. They had all the numbers for you to buy to pop on top of your ice cream cake.

I couldn't help but overhear as he said to his friend:

0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9... I guess you just get screwed when you turn 10. That sucks.

Yes indeed...

Joe The Plumber

While watching the debate last night I knew that the reporters across America were scrambling to find "Joe the Plumber" and sure enough, there's news regarding his failure to hold a plumbing license in the town in which he operates.

The article also says that he doesn't earn more than $250,000 - which is the income level at which Obama's tax plan would actually increase. (Having done none of the research myself I'll trust that the figure that 95% of us make less than $250,000 is accurate.)

Joe Wurzelbacher "the plumber" said "if you believed (Obama), I'd be receiving his tax cuts." UM so, why the fuss???

I give Joe credit for acknowledging that perhaps too much time was spent at the debate talking about him. He said he felt like Britney Spears with a headache, everyone wanted to know and that he hoped he wasn't embarrassing himself.

Not at all Joe… not at all.

Last day

Today marks the last day of my non-vacation. I spent the weekend at my parents with J. He got to meet the relatives and help Mom and Dad with some needed household things.

We managed to visit a couple of wineries in Prosser, Kestral and Airfield. My college chum Flint is the wine maker at Kestral, but he was not around when we arrived. Airfield was fun the sampler people had a lot of energy and made the experience a hoot.

We bought lots of wine at both places.

Today we're running errands, getting me a bus pass (because I am actually going to work this month) getting the cars washed and a few minor things for around the condos.

I am woefully behind on my bookclub book and fear that I'll be the one that doesn't finish it, even though I've been off for a week. Starting the daily commute will help I'm sure.


I'm still in a good place (mentally) about the job situation. If (when) I get laid off the severance will be enough to survive for a while without much worry. Don't fret about the tp gal, she will land on her feet!

Happy Columbus Day!

I'm still not in Greece

Having had to go into work for two VERY IMPORTANT meetings with the new owners of our company, the fact that I chose to be in town has turned out to be a good choice.

I'm keeping up on email, but mostly playing house to fill my days. Last night I made a yummy chicken garlic penne pasta with fresh tomatoes. So good! (even if I may say so myself.)

Dad is in the hospital, so J and I are going over Saturday for a quick visit and to help M&D with some things. It is a one day trip and yet somehow the aunts and uncle have been informed that we're coming. Lucky J!

Dad is mostly ok, he's anemic and they don't know why. Those early morning phone calls suck though. He says he feels good, but they won't let him leave the hospital. Maybe he's not the best judge of what's going on.

I'm glad the schedule has worked out that we can go to visit.

Other than that, the week has been a whirlwind of chores, shopping and visiting friends. I'm not sleeping in or anything, but am having fun.

The Work Situation

It's still not ok to comment publicly about the company I work for and I wouldn't dream of discussing anything remotely confidential. However, there has been a lot of articles in the press lately that I would characterize as very similar to the information provided to the folks on staff at former MegaBank.

When a bigger company gobbles you up, under any circumstances there is an evaluation of the staff on both sides of the acquisition that are evaluated to determine who is redundant. The evaluation of the staff on the acquirer side is usually a convenient opportunity to rid the payroll of problem people - most of the staff on the acquirer side are considered to be "safe." Those of us on the acquired side do not have the same safety net.

I'm extremely confident that in spite of my excellent skills, good attitude, and moderate salary that there's likely no need for TPgal at the new company. I'm ok with this reality. I'm financially better off than I was when eCharge closed its doors without notice, and my support system is stronger.

They're telling us we will know our disposition (aka fate of employment) by December 1st. There are a couple of options within that scenario that are attractive, but I don't be waiting until then to start looking. I would rather walk away from a severance package and into a stable job than pass up an opportunity to advance my career, or even take myself in a new direction.

For folks who don't feel like they have options, the December timeline is terrible. Two months (well... 6 weeks at this point) is a long time to twist in the wind. I personally don't feel like I'm twisting, I still feel in control of my own reality.

It would be a bummer to walk away from a year end bonus (I KNOW, HOW ON EARTH CAN A COMPANY THAT WAS TAKEN OVER STILL HAVE BONUSES?) that I had hoped to use for an event later in 2009. But...if the right job comes along, I will gladly take it. I understand that there is a cost to sticking it out to the bitter end in a situation like this, morale tends to drop to negative numbers.

As much as I'm motivated by money, I need to be happy. I've spend enough time being cranky.

So, more news as it comes out. When I know what's going on with me I'll share. In the meantime, I'm being super conservative with my money and not regretting the cancellation of the Greece trip for one moment.

The Non-Vacation

I'm having a 1950's housewife vacation. Well, not the vacation of a 1950's housewife, but pretending to be a 1950's housewife. I'm cleaning, cooking being way too domestic.

Yesterday after I had lunch with Becky and ran errands (returning one of the swimsuits) I ran to the grocery store and picked up things for dinner.

In an homage to the 1950's I made a big garlicky meatloaf, homemade mashed potatoes and threw in some asparagus to green up the plate. It was a meal that I wouldn't have done just for me, and was way too much for just J and I. Fortunately, Thursdays are Survivor Nights with our friends (and family) D&C. The four of us devoured my heart attack special in no time.

The trick to my meatloaf... using two different kinds of meat - the leanest ground beef you can find, and plain old ground sausage. Holy Crap... it is a good combo. It also helps to not be shy with the garlic and the spices. I didn't find the bread crumbs until after I was done with the mix, so I took salad croutons, crushed them and used them as filler.

Over the course of dinner (and two bottles of wine that C and I mostly polished off ourselves) we hatched an evil, diabolical plan. Wanna hear it? Good!

In looking at my things with a critical eye (something I strongly recommend to you all after cleaning up Martha's things) I realized I have a rather large collection of arts and crafts supplies. I use to make my own holiday cards and scrap books. Now I have lots of rubber stamps, special paper, cutters and embossing materials.

Since I don't use these items anymore, but I do have a significant investment in them so throwing them away or giving them to strangers doesn't feel right. C is in the same boat in that she has lots of this crap laying around too... so here's my diabolical plan:

C will plant an idea in the ear of "the one they warned me about" to have a craft night with the idea that we'll swap stuff that we no longer need. C and I will bring all of our stuff, and intermingle it with everyone else's stuff and then suddenly get called away and leave EVERYTHING behind!

Yes, it would be easier to give it away but this feels more, oh I don't know...evil. And I like being a little bit evil.

I am moving so slow this morning... maybe it has to do with the two bottles of wine. I just can't seem to get going. I've showered, watched an episode of Law & Order but fell asleep so I had to watch it again. I'm a slug.

I am off though... I have a plan for today and it doesn't involve an elaborate dinner. J is working late tonight so we'll probably grab some quick chow later on and watch a movie. That's my plan anyway; he is allowed to have his own ideas. I haven't completely squashed his free will just yet. (In the secret rules of women guidebook it says to wait until after you're married to kill their free will. I may not actually get to that activity because I'm having so much fun in the "woo him" stage - why move on?)

Love Birds

I'm honestly trying not to love blog too much, but I did want to share some photos from the weekend in Long Beach. Don't worry, I do know the difference between things that are fun to do, and things that should NEVER be photographed...

Change of Plans

Heavy Sigh


After a long discussion and an evaluation of my finances I made a really tough decision yesterday.

Because my employment outlook is uncertain and bleak and this vacation was going to basically eat up my entire short term savings I cancelled the Greece trip.


I was able to recover my frequent flyer miles (140,000) and use my travel insurance to cover the cancellation fees on the sailboat trip. I am "out" the boat trip costs but I'm feeling strongly this is the right move.

J gets a lot of credit for asking tough questions, but being adamant that any decision I made was about my financial situation and not about him or his desire for me to be home. I talked it over with my trusted advisor Becky who is equally passionate about travel and about practical financial decisions and she helped me calm the swirling thoughts.


Its not easy to decide not to go, and it is a dissapointment but the idea of spending my savings right now just feels wrong. We were also told yesterday that the new company will tell us what our compensation packages are going to be by the end of the week. Everything is on the table for adjustment....vacation time, seniority, insurance, salary. Its true that my being here will have no influence on that whatsoever but if the package is meager I've protected myself in the short term. If the package is adequate but I'm only employed for a short period I've got some cushion. If the promote me to CEO I'll buy the country of Greece and go in the future.


I'm still going to take the next week off because I need time to decompress. I'll be in town and will likely be doing house stuff. I'm considering putting my condo on the market. If its going to take six to nine months to sell it may be time to get started. Its just an idea at this point. And, with that kind of a timeline there's time to adjust the path if my life plan goes awry.


I'm not really sure I want to share my entire thought process with the work people but I need to tell them something. I will be coming back to work earlier than planned and the will likely notice. I'm tempted to leave my out of office message at the three week mark so people will seek out answers vs save their needs for me.


I'm sad, but also have some relief that I'm doing the smart thing. (Being an adult is a bitch sometimes.)


I'll be mostly on cell phone the next week and a half. Feel free to call.



- TP

Vacation Countdown

With the romantic weekend over, plans have really come together for my departure for Greece Wednesday.


I'm getting a stronger picture of my fellow adventurers and I don't think J has much to worry about. So far there's the Colorado guy who seemed nice enough, and now the 60 year old Austrailian mom who is coming with her two sons. (19 and 22). I'm not hot enough to pull off a shipboard romance with a 22 year old (if I was wanting too _ which I'm not).


The 55 year old retired military woman doesn't seem to be on the manifest. Oh well


I'm mostly packed, I may go back and edit a little more as maybe I don't need four t-shirts. And maybe I'll make an edit to my long pants. I was going to bring a pair of capris but maybe the jeans I'll going to fly in will double for any cold weather. Nightime lows are hovering around 65 degrees so I doubt I'm going to need a parka. My main issue has been wanting clean clothes for the return trip, but I'm assured washing can be accomplished. I've flown in four day old jeans before and I'm just not going to fret over it.


So far I've packed into just the backpack and I have faith it will work. The bonus is that most of the stuff I have to take I can ditch upon departure from the boat. I'll have room for trinkets. I don't know about money....


On the work front, its been stressful and I've agonized about leaving, but since I personally can't change anything about the "acquisition" I just have to have faith that if a decision is made to cut my job that I'll get some notice and a reasonable severance.


I'll deal with the job thing upon my return. I just wish I had more information. We all do.


For the time being vacation is the plan. My camera is charged and my passport is ready.


J will be blogging a little when I check in and I've left him with some get to know you type questions in case he wants to share.

Nancy Sinatra

These are "THE" boots I was talking about. I LOVE this outfit, I feel preppy and kicky and a little bit sexy.

Sorry about the bathroom shot... I didn't want to dig out the tripod this morning.

Sinead O'Connor No More

One of the side effects of weight loss surgery is the irritating loss of hair. It has to do with the diminished amount of protein that is absorbed and the mere act of the surgery can shock your system enough to cause the hair to fall out.

For me, this was frustrating because I already had (have) a thin patch at the top of my head. I'm not sure if this is genetic or due to my terrible diet pre-surgery - regardless, having MORE hair fall out was not a side effect I was looking for.

Thankfully (I guess) it is a slow process. It started in earnest about 2 months after surgery and lasted for about 4 months. I would lose hair in the shower, while brushing my hair, walking and breathing. Some WLS patients can't stand it and cut their hair short (not cancer patient short, but short.) I am vain and decided that a comb over was the way to go.

While it may have been noticeable to everyone, most people didn't say anything. There's nothing like being told about something you know about, hate, but can't do anything to fix. (See Pres. G.W. Bush)

In the last few months the shedding has slowed to a normal rate, there's still hair in my brush, but I'm not clogging the vacuum anymore (not that I actually vacuum... please!)

More exciting than the fact that I've stopped being invited to the Sinead O'Connor fan club meetings, my hair is actually growing back. I didn't notice at first, but now I have a 1 1/2 inch halo of hair at my scalp. It looks like frizz, but I'm not complaining. It means that within a few months or so, my hair will be fuller and less "thin" up top.

Woo Woo.

Closet Shopping

The days of being able to shop for clothes in my closet at almost officially over. I have very few items that I'm saving for "the day when they fit."

There's a kicky dress I purchased at an antique store and the tall leather boots I bought but haven't been able to get around my monster calves.

As of today we're down to one item. I was able to get the boots on! I already have the perfect outfit picked out for their first outing.

Tuesday, I will wear the boots, with black tights and this cute shorter black and green skirt and a black turtleneck. It will be sassy and yet will still be appropriate for the night out which includes dinner at Purple and The Phantom of the Opera.

Being able to get the boots on makes my excitement for fall so much greater!


I also did some mall shopping this morning and picked up a pair of jeans - SIZE 14 Petite! Damn girl, you're tiny!

Donations Accepted

more the engrish!

What a day

What a week....

Work still sucks but the manager who is breathing down my neck was MIA today so I was able to actually work. You won't be getting any details on my "error" but I feel confident that legally and ethically I was and am correct. Time will work it out.

The only really "issue" is that I'm leaving town for almost a month, and it's frustrating that THIS is the memory that my manager will have during my absence. However, I have been working to make sure that my i's are dotted and my t's are crossed before I leave.

The performance review cycle kicks in while I am away and I will be dropping an EXTENSIVE annual review write up on his desk so there can be no doubt of what I have contributed this year. He can view it through whatever eyes he wants, but I HAVE delivered in 2008.

So, the effort to dot the i's and cross the t's is massive. It helps that I finally have a full staff and everyone is working. I'm learning to delegate and that is actually moving the dial on lots of activities. I'm happy happy happy with my people these days.

I've spent the last couple nights at a strange man's house. Ok, he's not strange... he's lame! I don't mean boring. He's a work friend who had surgery on both of his feet and his partner had to leave town 3 days into his recovery. I went over to provide moral support, get dinner and let the dogs out to poop.

Their house is lovely and I like it. It is very put together and far more stylish than my little heterosexual girl condo. In the room I was staying in the art on the walls color coordinated perfectly with the bedding and I asked if it was staged (condo for sale!) for the sale and I was told no, that's just how it looks. WOW! I've seen coordinated before, but this is a whole new level.

Speaking of levels, the condo has about five levels and at one point in the early morning dealing with the gods I got lost. I can be forgiven for not having my orientation straight (no pun intended) at 5 am in someone elses house.

The dogs are great and without words they can convey their needs... PEE PEE PEE PEE PEE PEE and then as soon as they are back in the house... FOOD FOOD FOOD FOOD FOOD. I wish people could be so clear.

The mood at MegaBank is ok, people seem to be waiting for whatever the market is going to do, but for the most part are staying focused on the tasks at hand. There's not a lot of Chicken Little "the markets are falling, the markets are falling!" going on. I'm going to stay put for a while and see how things go. Maybe once the year is over I'll put out feelers into my non-banking contacts and see what I can come up with, but for right now I'm ok.

I am however - STILL AT WORK and don't really expect to leave until after 8 or 9 tonight. I have another 7 working days until I leave for vacation, but I've got plans after work all next week ('sept Monday) so the opportunity to knock things out of the park is limited. The days are FILLED with other peoples shit. Today I had two appointments after 5pm -and honestly I'M NOT THAT IMPORTANT!!!!

J comes home tomorrow, so I'll work late tonight and leave the computer and blackberry here and focus on a relaxing "weekend". Tuesday I get to see Phantom of the Opera - which I'm really excited about. I emailed whatshisface today and said I had been listening to the sound track over and over so I was ready to sing along with the actors! I love live theater, its so entertaining!

Have a great weekend!

Oh and here's an open comment to the mother f*ckers who broke into Becky's house and stole her 5 year old son's backpack AND the cute Buddha statue... YOU SUCK!!!!!

Wish I were there

I've been getting photo's like this all week from various points along J's vacation itinerary.

Don't you just want to take your shoes off and walk along the surf line?

Deep Reflections

I had two people tell me yesterday that I'm essentially disappearing. They weren't referring to my skinnier self (although, I am sporting a cute new small skirt purchased in the regular person's department --and not the biggest size on the rack either! When will that stop being novel I wonder?)

These folks, who have the best of intentions, called me on the carpet for basically turning into one of THOSE women who once they are in a relationship start speaking solely in "us" and "we." I certainly don't see myself that way - I still feel 100% like me, only for the first time ever I'm in a solid, adult relationship. "We don't feel that way, we are happy..." (barf)

I hope I can be forgiven for jumping with both feet into this relationship. I understand that it seems inconceivable that after a lifetime of not dating that I would seriously have found "the one" after only being on the market (if you will excuse the phrase) for a month. I didn't think it would happen either... I mean it is insanity to think that the second person you meet is really the one to stick to. However, feeling the way I do about J I won't continue to shop around just because he arrived on my doorstep early in the dating process.

To be fair, no one is suggesting that what I am experiencing isn't real. The concern seems to be the speed at which this became a discussion about long term, life long things. Nothing has been decided yet about that, even though there is plenty of talk. What I find somewhat ironic is that when SadRico started dating again and found his now Mrs. Rico I counseled him to wait 1 year before getting engaged. Am I planning on taking my own advice... nope. However J is on point for when the question is asked, so you never know it might be a year, or never... I'm not overly traditional, but on that front - boys ask the girl.

Regardless of my inexperience in the dating realm, I am a strong, confident person who knows exactly what I want out of this life. I have made significant decisions to get myself to where I am today and I fully intend to continue down the patch I'm on. Having a partner I trust, adore and feel completely at home with is the bonus of all bonuses as I move forward with my life.

It is hard when people you love don't immediately jump on the "OMG I'm so happy for you" bandwagon, but I appreciate their candor. Their comments are not being ignored, and I promise you that in addition to allowing myself to feel happiness and joy over finding J that I have spent time focusing on if he's the one I'm going to hitch my star to, or if I should let him hitch his star to mine. I keep comimg back to the fact that my list of practical things I need / want / deserve in a partner are present in this person. Plus, in the non-practical way he makes me happy. That counts too.

In no way am I suggesting he's perfect. I'm not perfect and neither are you - right!? I know that we will hit a hitch and argue about something we both feel passionate about. Only time will tell how we weather that event. I know that there might be times when I look across the table at him and wonder what I was thinking? (I really can't imagine that scenario, but based on everyone I know who is married it seems that you ALL have had that thought at one point or another, so it seems logical that it will happen to me.)

I know these folks are honestly and genuinely happy for me. Their concern is appreciated and I don't fault them for looking at my inexperience and trying to help me 'see the big picture' but I fully believe I'm seeing it.

I'm seeing the big picture and I love what I see.

OMG

WORK IS HELL RIGHT NOW.

It is wholly unrelated to any market conditions; I made a tactical error and am paying for it.

I want to crawl under my desk and live there. I do not eat crow well.

Finally

After almost two months at the same weight I've finally started dropping again. When it first starts to happen I tend to think that it's a fluke, but not so.

I'm down 6 pounds in the last week. That's an incredible amount and isn't sustainable. I've earned to be happy with slow and steady along with the dramatic and unusual. In 1.4 pounds I'll be at the 130 lost mark. pop! (the sound of my own mind blowing)

I still have a way to go to get to the "goal" of 130 but considering how far I've come what's 60 pounds? To be honest 130 seems unlikely I would be happy with anything under 150.

So, j and talked last night about getting serious about returning to the gym routine. We've been together for two and a half months now, and neither of us are going anywhere so we can chill out and spend the time apart to be healthy.

The Greece vacation will be a kink in my routine, but I'm not waiting. I had a great workout yesterday and my gym stuff is I'm the car for after work.

Go (tiny) TP gal!!

PS: I am missing J. How on earth did someone who didn't exist in my world when summer started get to be so important? I don't know but I'm happy about it! My life is charmed right now...don't stand too close or you'll get some on you.

Single Again

Wow, it's so incredible t be single again. I was up late last night doing something I haven't done in more than 9 weeks. It was hot, steamy and took hours. Yes my friends, I ironed clothes - on a Saturday night. Woo Woo!

Today I woke up (alone), showered and then went to church. Believe it or not the earth did not quake when I passed over the threshold into the sanctuary. I was welcomed and I realized I haven't been to church since early July.

After an enjoyable morning, I drove to the gym (I know, ironic) where I lifted weights and spent 43 minutes on the elliptical. Why 43 minutes? Well...not to over share, but I've been plagued with a bit of the stomach flu for the last few days and that was as long as I could go without, um... having to go.

Once home I had some lunch and now I'm taking a small break from cleaning my garage. I had some boxes of Messy Martha's things and I'm in the mental state that it's time to get rid of "stuff." I'm disposing of boxes, an old car stereo, things I should have taken to goodwill and the HUGE box my damn TV came in. J assures me that when the time comes to move that I won't need the box. It really is massive and makes it a challenge to get my car in the garage. I'm going to trust that he's right and get rid of it.

I came in for a moment to ... um... well go and managed to catch a call from J. They are in Williamsburg, VA and he's contemplating ditching the folks to spend tomorrow at a Busch Amusement Park to partake of the roller coasters. Oh my, I have a danger guy on my hands. Honestly, I wish I was there. I haven't been able to ride roller coasters in so long and I totally can now! I'm not really pining away to be in Williamsburg - the accuweather says that it is currently 91 (at 6pm) as compared to our lovely 76.

The garage isn't going to clean itself...so I'm going to head back out. Later, I'm going to sit on my couch alone and catch up on last seasons Grey's Anatomy. I only have 4 more to go to be current. I'm told this is important homework for Thursday nights with Dan and C. In the winter J and the gang gather together for Survivor and Grey's Anatomy. I'm happy to be included and will gladly catch up on GA.

Here I am

I took J to the airport this morning. He and his parents are spending a week discovering historic early America. They will be exploring Jamestown, Fredricksburg and other sites important to our collective history.

I'm not overly excited about him being gone for a week, but as my three week Greece holiday is coming right up I was careful not to be whiny about his trip. I teased him about him finding someone better while he was on his trip but since he's traveling with his parents and their friend Sally (65) its pretty unlikely.

J has been dolling out the information about he and I to his parents in a slow and indirect way. I keep telling him that his mom is a woman and that she NEEDS details, but he's convinced that because they haven't been able to see us together like my family and the rest of his that it's better not to overwhelm her with how serious things are. I kind of get it, its only been two months and some of my people are surprised at the level of togetherness that J and I have achieved - but "they" say... when you know, you know.

His parents will be here for Thanksgiving and Christmas and I'm pretty confident that by Thanksgiving his parents will be 100% in the know about us. Heck, I think they are already - you can't tell me that not one of the 400 cousins hasn't called to "share" about J's girlfriend who they got to meet. Or that the fact that I'm at his house every time they call - 10 pm Saturday night and still there at 9am Sunday morning... these are smart people and it doesn't take a rocket scientist.

Boys and their moms have a special bond which I appreciate and will honor, but I think he fails to realize that in some areas women are women. He thinks that because she's the mother of a son that she's not into the girly things and I think he's wrong. We were talking about the planning of a large hypothetical social event (calm down, nothing is planned or seriously on the table at this point) and I suggested that if we get to that point I'd like to make sure his mom gets to be participate in the planning. He assured me that she wouldn't care about that (again, because she's the mother of a son.) Oh, I 100% disagree. I bet money that if it should come to pass that she'll be excited and probably touched to be included.

Anyway, all that is neither here nor there. There's no planning taking place - we're focused on getting through this week, enjoying our long weekend in Long Beach in two weeks and then getting through the 22 days while TP is hanging out in Greece. And, if I hear from one more person that "absence makes the heart grow fonder", I'm going to pop them in the mouth. Yes, missing someone does intensify your feelings but it also sucks. Besides, I'm not sure how much more fond of J I can get...

So, J's out of town and like the friend who only calls you when they are between relationships I expect to be posting more frequently this week.

Bye Bye Badge

In the "how ironic" category - our stock at MegaBank hit the two dollar range and on the same day I accidentally flushed my employee badge down the toilet.

Over the top

Here's your fashion advice for the day.

Be a fan, embrace your team, your favorite player, go ahead, spend $200 on an authentic (like) jersey. I say, wear it proudly to the game.

However, you don't need to fully suit up for the game to sit in the 300 section of Safeco Field. THEY ARE NOT GOING TO ASK YOU TO PLAY. You don't need cleats, nor do you need the kicky arm bands.

Blog Topics

With the impending presidential election, the hoopla around the vice president selections, federal takeovers of Freddie Mac and high profile executive firings (er... "retirements") at local companies you would think that I would have lots and lots to blog about...Not so much.

It is not that I'm not deep and don't have opinions, but everybody has opinions. Who cares really? Palin... she seems inexperienced but I'm not quite sure what the uproar is about her baby. He has Downs Syndrome - does that mean she can't have a successful work career? I don't think that's what the media is trying to imply, but it is one of the messages they are conveying. I know, there is speculation that the baby belongs to one of her kids but people also think Elivs is still alive.

Presidential Election..I live in Washington - we go Democrat. I don't have violent negative feelings about McCain but worry that because he's an extension of the current administration that he couldn't turn things around. I'm not convinced that Obama can do it either, but he's got the better shot in my opinion.

The takeover of Freddie Mac. WoW! Our economy is going to take a huge hit for that. It needed to happen, but I think its going to hurt.

Executive firings... er "retirements" - I know it is "how it works" but it kills me that you can run a company into the ground and still get 24 MILLION to walk away.

Happy Tuesday!

Done and Done!

After being alone for so long it is a little hard to get use to having someone around who actually wants to be helpful. I felt sheepish when I asked J if he would give up his Saturday to help me empty the storage unit in Bellingham where the remainder of Messy Martha's items were stashed. J was not "eager" to go, but was willing and even called in members of the family to be in the wings in case we needed them. I couldn't believe that these folks would even consider coming out to help J's new girlfriend whom they've only met once - but I was assured that this is all part of the benefits of being "in" a big family.

We parked the rental van at the entrance of the storage locker and then started sorting the stuff into piles for GoodWill and the dump. Thankfully, I wasn't emotionally invested in any of it and sorting was easy.

At one point I did experience a bit of an emotional meltdown. I was thinking that this crap represented her whole life and I was just throwing it away, and how would I feel if my life summed up to a storage unit filled with boxes and shitty furniture? It was about that time that J suggested a break. We had a discussion about how this activity would be so much harder if it were our parents, and then had a moment where we realized that when/if that happens we won't have to do it alone.

Barb and Frank, Martha's friends came by and picked up all the art supplies, crafting materials and "art" that was left. They filled a truck and drove away with all the things I was feeling guilty about. They have people who will enjoy the crafting supplies, beads, yarn, paints, pens, and even the strange little cards Martha use to make. Her hundreds of hours of effort were not thrown away and I was happy to see go with people who appreciated Martha and her gifts.

The bed that I had been fretting about was easy to move but the underside of it had some mold growing on it and it made me nervous that the Goodwill people wouldn't take it. However, we drove up, they unloaded it and we drove away. As we got back in the truck I said to J 'I can't believe they took the bed" and he said "SHhhhh, we haven't made it out of the parking lot yet!" He put the truck in gear and we drove away like we dumped a dead body.

The dump trip was somewhat satisfying in that you back your vehicle up and start throwing things as hard as you can. All those nasty pooped on clothes that I washed and saved for her…. TOSS. Her journals with pages of angry opinions about how terrible the family and life was… TOSS. The stinky, pooped on mattress… TOSS. Junky, badly constructed, moldy tables… TOSS.

I had a huge sense of relief as we drove away from the storage unit place in our car after returning the truck and checking out of the unit. Now, I can focus on trying to remember the positive things about Martha vs. thinking of the burden of dealing with her stuff. There were plenty of things about her that were good, she was an amazing singer, musician and mostly her craft stuff (embroidery and painting) was really great. She made me four beautiful wall hangings that are above my bed and I think they are stunning, classic and I hope to display them forever. When I was a kid she introduced me to the ballet, an art form I love to this day. She was a word person and enjoyed reading and writing - two things we have in common. She also made her own way, in that she moved to San Francisco, formed a good unit of friends, built a life for herself and wasn't dependent on someone to take care of her. She took that a little to the extreme - I think you can be independent and still have someone in your life.

Having a partner doesn't make you weak.

After we were done we drove to Anacortes to visit with J's cousin who kindly let us shower and then fed us an amazing dinner. They have a lovely home on the water and I may have to start doing some serious sucking up in order to be invited up there again in the summer. (I'm not too worried about that actually)

We headed back to our part of the world around nine, and I was sleeping like the dead by 11:30. It was a big day and I'm thankful it is done.

My only advice to you all -- sort through your crap. Do you really need everything you are storing in your garage? Probably not. I challenge you to spend a few hours each month to rid yourself of "stuff". I'll be doing some of that next weekend. LESS IS MORE!!!!

This may be part of the problem

There might be reasons why the Greece trip isn't quite the anticipated event that normal vacations are. Last night I tried to arrange my travel from Athens to Keci Buku.

I have a flight from Athens to Rhodes, Turkey- where I will apparently pay for a visa to enter the country. Then I have 24 hours to take a hydrofoil to the island of Marmaris and then catch a taxi to Keci Buku. Somewhere in there I need to find a place to sleep.

My initial thought is to get to Keci Buku and just be there, but the places to stay are minimal, however, there are so many options on Marmaris that it's a tad daunting. Ideally, I'd like to stay at or near the marina - but I can't seem to find anything. Marmaris is a resort and the hotels I'd like to book have a three night minimum and appear to be all inclusive. The "lesser" more adventurous places have warnings about location from previous guests.

Maybe I should just wing it, get there and then spend my day finding a place to stay. People do it all the time, and I should be able to set my apprehensions aside.

I'm not planning where to stay on the back end of the trip. I'm going with the flow and will only book my hotel in Athens for the night before I leave. (Holiday Inn at the airport!)

I think if I was able to nail down how I was getting to the port to catch the sailboat my excitement level would increase. It bugs me that I'm haven't been able to work this out. The guidebooks and the online information for the sailboat people said I should work with an agent to make this happen. I guess, that's what I'm going to have to do.

And... I so have to get a new photo on my passport. I look NOTHING like the puffy gal in the picture. That is my task for today.

UPDATE: Noon, passport update accomplished. New passport with my better photo will be here in 7-10 days. Whew!

Odd.

I know, I know, I’ve been getting your email hints about the lack of blogging. Clearly, you know that this dating thing is going extremely well and it has been keeping me from my normal blogging activities. Blogging during the day (at work) really is supposed to be an exception and not the norm. My employer kind of wants me to focus on work, while I’m at work… CRAZY.

However, today is not the day in which I will completely live the “keep work and life separate” motto. I’m spinning on a number of topics that I should be able to work out on my own but I need to over share.

The first thing that’s going on with me is an odd state about the Greece trip. While I’m looking forward to it, it is just kind of looming out there as something that’s coming. I’m not in my normal state of pre-vacation excitement. Generally about this time I’ve started practicing my new language, spent time in the maps, planned out things I want to see and have been doing research on the history of the area. So far, I’ve only bought a couple swimsuits and am working out the items I need to pack. I haven’t spent as much time as I should yet to figure out where I’m going to stay in Athens and then in Rhodes.

I spoke yesterday with one of the folks who will be on the trip with me it wasn’t an instant “friendship” match, but he seemed like a tolerable fellow. I think the trip is going be small, meaning that instead of three boats of people we will likely be one boat. Maybe that will translate into more personal space for TPgal on the boat or more importantly less restrictions on how often we can shower.

Perhaps tonight I will do more Greece homework and finally mail the Seascape people my itinerary. Some of this apathy has to do with the horrific amount of work that has to get done before I can leave without guilt, but mostly it's about looking forward to other things in my life. Such as:

J and I are headed to Long Beach for a weekend at the end of September. I can't wait to show him where I grew up. He grew up in Denver and the ocean is a spectacular place to visit. I'll get to take him to some of my favorite places on earth. I hope the weather will cooperate because the beach is best experienced outdoors. Even if it's raining, we'll bundle up and enjoy walks on the beach. Oh gosh, I can't wait!!!

and

J and I finalized plans for a trip to visit his parents in February. This will be a mildly long weekend (Friday through Tuesday) with many of his relatives coming to help celebrate his dad’s 70^th birthday. Even though we’ll be forced to endure a weekend of chastity sleeping arrangements (i.e. him in the basement and me with an ankle bracelet low jack in an upstairs room) I’m really looking forward to it. There are a few things about the trip that I think will be great including spending good quality time with his parents, seeing where he grew up, and hanging out in Denver with someone who knows and likes the area. I’ll also get to see my gal pal Misty that weekend.

I think it’s odd that I’m more jazzed about a weekend in Long Beach and then in Denver with my new dude than I am about three weeks in Greece. I AM MENTALLY ILL.

Messy Martha...the return

No, she hasn't returned from the great beyond, but I did finally get a response from Social Security about the payment they took back. Actually, Social Security "assures" me they did not ask for the payment back and that the bank must have done it on their own accord. Whatever… there is an underpayment that I covered with funds from my personal savings account to the tune of $1700 and I want my money back.

Social Security is sorry to tell me that they do not recognize her will, nor the power of attorney information I provided and that I need to submit a document from the court stating my "appointment" to have the overpayment paid to me. In real people speak it means that I would have to send her estate to probate to get the appointment.

The attorney I spoke with told me that it would cost well over $1700 in attorney fees and notices to creditors to go the probate route. SWEET! He then advised me to call SS back and ask them to pay the overpayment to Martha directly. Her checking account is still open and any payments there will go to "her". Honestly, that's what I was trying to do in the first place. I didn't want a check cut to TPgal…I wanted the monies to go back to her checking account (where I would promptly cut a check to myself and close the account but that's neither here nor there.)

I've got a call into the Bellevue Social Security Office to see if talking to a real person will help. If that fails, I'll evoke the friend network and ping Janie's cousin for assistance. I hate to rely on the 'network' to get the Federal f*cking Government to do what is right, but I will!

At the end of the day I'm tired of dealing with the Martha stuff. The storage unit is hanging around my neck - but J said he would go with me Saturday to try to resolve it. It's going to be a long day. We'll have to take a bunch of stuff to GoodWill and then dispose of the stuff they won't take. The problem is that to sort the items we'll have to unpack the unit and make a decision about every single box. ICK.

Oh man… I'm not looking forward to it. For some reason the storage unit seems more daunting than dealing with the house, that was (if you read back) knee to waist deep in garbage, old clothes, stinky open food containers, dishes, adult diapers, poop, flies and "art supplies". J and I were talking a few weeks ago about the house and I explained that I had to deal with stuff there that was so gross that I couldn't really even think about. I said that I picked up poop off the floor and he asked…

J: "Oh, did she have pets?"
TP: "Nope..."
J: "eeeewwww"

Eeewww is right my friend…eeeww is right.

So, the storage unit shouldn't be that daunting. Everything is clean, boxed and neatly stacked. As a bonus, I'm not emotionally invested in any of it. Barb, the type A friend wants some of the art which she can gladly come pick up. I feel a little guilty about not wanting to bring the "art" back to my place, but I don't want it. Dad doesn't want it and it seems cruel to send it to brother dear and his family.

There are boxes and boxes of journals that she wrote over the years. On one hand it might be fun to go through them to read her "interesting" view of the world, but she was so unhappy that the ones I did look at made me bitter. Yes, there are letters written from my grandparents sprinkled throughout the journals, but the ones I found were followed by angry dissections about why her parents were bad people. Gosh, I'm so very thankful that I have the ability to see the happy side of life.

Anyway, of all the stuff the bed is really the thing that is bothering me, it is a monster queen sized wood platform with drawers. I was too chickensh*t to get rid of it when we were packing the house - stupid me. I was worried that we would have to throw it away, however, a quick check of the "can I donate it" section on www.SeattleGoodwill.org eases my mind. They will take it, now if J and I can lift it we'll be golden.

Sadly, there is a whole list of stuff they won't take that includes animals, auto parts and fire arms. ANIMALS! How stupid are people that they have to be told this???? "Uh, here's this horse we no longer need, can I have a tax receipt?"

Cross your fingers that we'll be done with this mess Saturday. It would be nice to apply the $89 per month storage fee to something else like my shoe collection or savings for a big once in a lifetime social event. I'm pretty sure that my attempt to get SS to pay Martha her final check will go nowhere, but I will try. If I can't get the money back, I wonder if it would be legal for me to deduct the $1700 I paid to cover her bills from my taxes? Who knows… if she could deduct the Hurricane Katrina victim allowance in 2005 (as a resident of Washington) who knows what you can do.

(here's a photo looking into the living room. See how she pulled out the vacuum cleaner, I'm sure it would have been a huge help!)

Summer's Over

With the long weekend behind us, its time to settle down and really focus on work. The days of daydreaming about romance and allowing the weight loss journey to be a reason to be distracted at the office need to end.

I'm leaving for Greece in 28 days and I have A LOT of work to do before I can leave without worry. The only way to get it done is to actually... um.... start. (of course, instead of being on the early bus this morning, I'm blogging. Perhaps I need a lesson in action vs. words.)

The long weekend was amazing. Even though we didn't really go anywhere it was great. I met the remainder of J's Seattle based family. They were funny and very nice. I felt very at ease and look forward to more 'family' events. Now, all that is left is meeting his parents. Based on how the rest of the family talks about J's M&D I'm not concerned at all about them. They are clearly adored.

Sunday, J & I met my parents in Roslyn for lunch. Roslyn is kind of a halfway point between where my parents live and here and my parents enjoy the Brick tavern. We didn't know it, but it was some sort of Pioneer Day or Logger Jamboree celebration. A parade was about to start as we pulled into town. We timed our visit perfectly as we moved inside the tavern, settled at a table while the parade was going on outside. We enjoyed a nice long, easy visit and then some of the parade participants came into the tavern and performed. The bag pipers played 4 or 5 songs and my dad was in heaven. My parents were taken with J and any anxiety I may have had about the visit wasn't an issue.

I talked to Mom last night and she said she could see that he's family. She said she was glad she finally got to meet him because we're moving at warp speed over here and she felt strange that she hadn't yet. She also said my aunts are concerned about the swiftness of this relationship, but once I get back from Greece J and I will head over for a visit and they will understand when they see us together.

Sunday night, J and I made dinner and opened some great wine. I really love that we can spend the whole day together and still sit and talk for hours.

We spent Monday on the couch watching movies and catching up on the Closer and Project Runway. We didn't actually watch The Committments - we mostly napped through it.

It was a great weekend. I need to head to the office, there may be more later...